Feel your feelings - they’re trying to tell you something
Feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, fear… we all have them. And as “professional, successful, grown-up” humans, we’re really good at pretending we don’t. Worse, we try not to let anyone see we feel them.
But here’s the thing: emotions aren’t the enemy. They’re more like little data points, giving us info about what’s going on inside us—if we’re brave enough to actually feel them, name them, and deal with them.
Even in a safe space, like a coaching session or a heart-to-heart with someone you trust, admitting you feel sad, angry, or guilty can feel scary. So what do we do? We shove it all into a corner and hope it goes away. Trouble is, it doesn’t. Eventually, it bursts out—sometimes in tears, sometimes in frustration—but that’s just your brain and body screaming, “Hey! Pay attention!”
As a coach, I don’t shy away when my coachees experience tears or strong emotions. In fact, I welcome them. Because letting it out in a safe, non-judgy space always helps. And beyond that, strong emotions can actually be super useful. They can help you:
Figure out what really matters to you
Make your arguments or decisions clearer
Keep going even when it’s tough
Get to the root of tricky problems
Spot your boundaries and what you won’t compromise on
Deal with problems that pop up when you pretend everything’s fine
Forgive yourself for feeling or doing stuff that’s hard to face
So next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, angry, or just plain sad, don’t shove it away. Listen to it. It’s carrying info that could actually help you sort things out and move forward. ___________________________________________________________________
Incidentally, as I was searching for an image to go with this blog, it became clear that in image libraries, women are only shown to be angry in a ‘I’ve asked you three times to tidy your room’ cross-mum kind of way, freakish hair-pulling witchiness, or something closer to real anger but she still has to be model-beautiful and/or half naked. Or the image is tagged as ‘mental disorder’. Hmmmm…
Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash